Friday, April 22, 2005

On change and being changed

My wife hates change. It unsettles her and she does not by nature "roll with it." I think that if the city decided to close one of the roads she drives to and from work every day, it would create a very stressful situation for her. I, on the other hand, am way more laid back about these sort of things. At least in the everyday. Perhaps it was some of the early "training" I had when I started to experiment with "recreational" drug use. One of the first things I was told about this sort of behavior was, "Once you swallow it, you swallowed it. You can go forward but not back, so just get to the other side as best you can; it may or may not be real, but it IS. Later, things will be different than they are now." Or something like that. Anyway, since then I have adopted the notion that everything is temporary and something to be experienced. Mostly good, some not so much, but all a part of what makes me me.
That being said, I used to find it difficult to be understanding of Stephanie's struggle with how to handle change. 22 years of marriage has taught me some things though. So to anyone who is struggling with change, however insignificant it may be to others, know you don't HAVE to like it or just accept it. You will work through it in your own way, same as those of us that you (mistakenly perhaps) think don't care. And you'll probably come out the other side as best you can, same as us.
So, Stephanie, you'll make it through these changes at work, same as when you started this job. And I'll listen and try to be as supportive as I can. I'll not say, "That's not a big deal." I'll just keep loving you and be very glad that God put us together.

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

The most beautiful creation

I often hear talk of the "most beautiful place on earth." Many times it is said that this area or that area is "God's Country." Colorado, Montana, Monterrey Peninsula, almost any tropical island beach, the forests of Maine all have their unique characteristics that cause us to really enjoy them. Set aside for a moment the absurdity that ONE place can be considered God's, it is easy to see why we can get so passionate about someplace. For me, it is often the last place I went on vacation that becomes my temporary favorite.
Along the same lines, have you ever been asked what your favorite song is? I can only answer this question with the knowledge that the answer will be out of date in a moment. But it is very easy to find beauty in almost any musical expression for me. It is amazing the different nuances composers and arrangers drop into the creative process. Certainly there are songs I like more than others and some arias leave me unmoved. But the end result of the process is usually very cool; I have not been inspired to create in that manner and I marvel at the result.
Visual art is not something I have spent much time contemplating, but there are some pieces I have seen that I found compelling. This sort of forced reflection brought on by external forces is pretty wild and again, I am so glad that it is in this world for us.
So, I am left wondering - what is the most beautiful creation in the world? And is there one thing that can be considered more beautful than any other? No, probably not. But then again, could it be that YOU are the most beautiful, incredibly unique creation made in this world? I know that when I consider my life (in a non-narcissistic way), I am blown away with the beauty and marvel that it is.
I accept the notion that I am created in my Maker's image. I believe that I was created (as were you), not just made, with a purpose beyond our ability to comprehend. Part of being ALIVE is the discovery of this purpose and its relationship with the life we in turn create for ourselves. Take comfort from this thought, and it will allow you to face today with the realization that right now is what you have. You are not promised tomorrow and so you should find joy in where you are now. Somehow.
Thank you God for loving me, and gifting me with the beauty of existence. Let me learn to use it in a manner that brings you glory.